the meanest comment i've ever gotten
i have had my fair share of rude comments and messages over the years, online via social media and offline face-to-face. the most hurtful comment i've ever gotten was just a few months ago. it was right after storie went to the hospital over christmas break. we had spent several days in the hospital, not knowing what the outcome would be when we left. fortunately, everything turned out fine, but we were rather emotionally exhausted by the time santa clause came to town.
a couple of days after christmas, we were out and about doing christmas returns. i had received a gift card from my cute mother-in-law and found a soft beret in a color i loooooved, so i put it on, snapped a pic, and asked MY CLOSEST FRIENDS (ig followers) if i should... like... get it.
87% of y'all were homies. 13% of you either accidentally hit the "no" button (does anyone else have a PANIC ATTACK when you click the wrong vote option?!?!?!?!) or don't like ~fashion~. BUT i had ONE FOLLOWER that went ABOVE AND BEYOND with her response to my poll...
she responded to this instagram story via DM and said:
"probably shouldn't, since you were just begging all of us for money."
you know that part in mean girls when regina kisses aaron samuels at the halloween party after telling cady that she would "talk to him" for her? and cady first realizes that regina george is evil and says that "my stomach felt like it was going to fall out of my butt"? that's how i felt.
when the follower said "you were just begging all of us for money", she was referring to the go fund me account that two darling girls had set up for us to help out with storie's astronomical medical bills. i didn't ask them to and i didn't expect anyone to. i had lots of people texting/emailing/messaging me while storie was in the hospital asking if we had one started, and so when i found that someone had, the easiest way to respond to the questions was to put it on my story:
like i said in that ^^ instagram story, advertising the go fund me was something i felt awkward doing. so when i received the DM telling me that i was "begging for money", after i had just gotten out of the hospital with my perfect baby, crying so hard my eyes felt like they would never not be puffy, and watching my rock of a husband completely fall apart and sob, YEAH, that comment really hurt my feelings. it made me feel like a greedy shopaholic who wasn't grateful for the hundreds of people that so generously donated to our go fund me. it was exactly the OPPOSITE of how i felt, so i felt like someone had punched me in the gut.
regardless, this isn't the first hurtful comment i've gotten, and it certainly won't be the last. i went to kind of a catty high school and the girls there were mean. i came home fairly often pretty shocked at how rude they could be (and how rude their moms could be!!). my mom would always tell me "water off a duck's back". something about a duck's feathers naturally having oil on them, so when they get wet, the water doesn't affect their buoyancy. they can still float. she wanted me to be unaffected by gossip and hurtful comments. she didn't want them to sink me, but to roll right off and for me to continue happily paddling, eating bread, unaffected, like ducks.
being kind isn't always easy, and i for SURE am not perfect, but i don't think that means that we should stop trying. you shouldn't quit just because something is hard. my grandma has something called her 2/3 rule: everything you say should be at least two of three things. kind, true, or necessary. if it isn't, you don't say it. there aren't any footnotes with this rule. there aren't any exceptions. "but they have a lot of followers" or "but she had on an ugly outfit" or "but she is SO fake and is ALWAYS rude to me". again: i'm not perfect at this. but we should ALL be striving to always be kind, because there is no excuse not to be constantly trying.
i hope that we can all try to be a little kinder. keep the 2/3 rule in the back of your mind when you're tempted to gossip. ask yourself, "would i say this about someone if the person was right next to me?". and, when you are on the receiving end of people who are NOT following my grandma's 2/3 rule (SHAME ON THEM!!!!!!), remember my mom's advice: water off a duck's back. CUZ I THINK U A SWAN. don't allow hurtful comments sink you, ever! xo